Jain for a day

[updated on Sep 2nd]

Yesterday evening Jigar was telling me that a week starting from today marks a special time for Jains and they’re involved in fasting.

A one day fast would be from yesterday night to tomorrow morning – only thing permitted would be hot water.

I don’t know what made me decide to try it as well, just for one day.

Is it just so that I could claim to myself “I did it” and even gloat about it on my blog. Well, I hope not 🙂 – one thing I believe is that I’m never under any obligation to prove anything to anybody. Or maybe its a kind of curiosity to know what a Jain goes through. At times I’ve been curious to know what a smoker goes through, but have never seriously felt like smoking a cigarette in order to find out! 😉 So this is quite different. I think more than curiosity, its a kind of empathy.

I told my Mom yesterday – she didn’t take it too well at first but has been more or less supportive.

So far I’ve survived without my breakfast. So its lunchtime at work now, and I just had my lunch – a glass of hot water. I’ll probably go in for dessert 😉 soon. I’m kind of starting to sweat and my stomach’s starting to growl. I have no clue if I’m going to complete it or if I’ll just end up creating a big scene fainting on the Electronics City campus – but time (and this blog) will tell.

This was a very interesting point:

Fasting in mind as well as body
It is not sufficient for a Jain simply to not eat when fasting. They must also stop wanting to eat. If they continue to desire food the fast is pointless.

Source: Jainism Customs

Hmm… so far so good, taking each moment at a time and getting back to work…

—–

oh no
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15:40: Of all the days in the world, *today* would have to be the day they distribute sweets and icecreams to every employee in the office.

Maybe this was some kind of test. Survived it.

—–

18:11: Time for an evening snack – another glass of hot water. Amma had called up to persuade me somewhat weakly to have lunch, and then a bit more strongly to drink atlast a glass of milk. I told her about the icecream and she told me to eat it as milk is considered as “legitmate” during a fast. I assured her that I’m not fasting to please somebody else so don’t need to use the back door workarounds, and that I would be ok. She did observe that my voice was a bit weak. She’s very sharp and was right – I was feeling a bit weak, and also having a very slight headache and dizziness that keep coming on and off occasionally… but otherwise in good spirits. Will be in office till late evening today as I came in at noon. Still alert and able to concentrate at work, was able to even have a productive discussion with two freshers new to the team.

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21:15: Almost fell asleep in the bus but luckily woke up in time. Got off at Malleswaram circle – around 1.5 kms from my house, and walked to Jigar’s house nearby. This was the first time I was trying fasting in my life. I was surprisingly still feeling energetic, except that the ground seemed to be swaying slightly too and fro once in a way. Was speaking to Jigar’s Dad in the ground floor when Jigar came down and told his Dad that I was doing this fast. His Dad told me “fasting is no joke” and I had to softly reply that I knew (now). Then Jigar told him that I really hadn’t consumed anything since yesterday night except for hot water – and he got the idea… and suddenly exclaimed “you are the luckiest man I tell you!!”
[actually I’ve realised this time and again, though I’ve found I should never take it for granted as “my” luck – as a matter of fact, one of the main points of this blog is to try and share the things I’ve been fortunate enough to learn!]
He explained that today was really the most auspicious time for the Jains, and then suggested I do it again next Thursday. I said I would, though I probably should’ve waited till the next morning to see if I could complete the current one in the first place! 😉 I declined Jigar’s offer of a lift – he walked home along with me. I was feeling energetic and was really curious about what’s really the limit of my body [though I have no plans of going to the hilt like David Blaine to find out].

At home Amma was quite concerned but not unduly, she again tried to convince me to drink a glass of milk. But I asked for dinner – a glass of hot water – and she started heating it. I was just standing around and after a while wanted to go and retire, and suddenly remembered I still hadn’t got my water. I shouted irritably – “how much time does it take??” and walked to the kitchen… and by then realised with surprise (and told her) – how vulnerable hunger makes me to losing temper. I could recall instances long ago when I was very hungry – and I would end up being over-sensitive yelling at anything and everything that looked even remotely wrong! [though throughout my life my anger has anyways been short-lived 🙂 ]. I took it for granted that Amma would excuse me so enjoyed my dinner and came upstairs… and ended up blogging! Its almost 11 PM now, I better retire for the day. Was about to ask Amma the all important question “what’s for breakfast tomorrow?” but then its nothing but “desire food” so I think I’ll just find out tomorrow… hope I’m able to wake up tomorrow 😉

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9-Aug-2005
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Woke up at around 6:30 and felt surprisingly comfortable. Completed a few minutes of suryanamaskaara and then just sat still for an hour. Had my bath and went downstairs. The fact that I was quite ok was really quite unexpected – I felt I could even talk a walk but decided not to overdo things. I first slowly had a glass of milk. And then after a few minutes, ate some idlis – literally a break – fast. Strangley, as I started eating (very slowly) – my hunger started increasing. Still I ate only 3 idlis (plate idlis) – the quantity I would normally eat – our stomach says “stop” long before we think we need to stop eating, if only we pay enough attention to listen to it.

After a few minutes suddenly I felt extremely tired. It was around 9 AM – my bus was at 9:35 so I lied down for a while and suddenly felt slightly nauseous and exhausted. Amma jumped at the golden opportunity to say “I told you so. See, you should’ve drank the glass of milk atleast”. And then she added “See, my friends when they fast, eat fruits and fruit juices and milk when necessary, there is nothing wrong with that. They are highly orthodox and have been following fasting for years, don’t tell me you know more than them”. Well maybe I should’ve replied “I know less than them, and that’s an advantage I have” but then mothers and logic are generally mutually exclusive, and in any case I wasn’t in a mood to argue. I continued to take some rest – it was a very lousy 15 minutes, but I finally woke up and left the house, and managed to catch the bus in time. I was a bit groggy and felt better on the way – after all it takes 1.5 hours to get to Electronics City so I had plenty of time to relax. 🙂 Lunch at 1:30 went down quite comfortably as well.

Jigar later called me in the evening and asked if I was all right. He said the Jains usually break their fast with only liquids for a while, and take solid food only later. Well I could’ve used this information a bit earlier… but anyway it was a good experience. This evening on a sudden impulse I whimsically ate some junk food – a chocolate cake and a Paneer Masala Sandwich in the office. The cake was very tasty. The sandwich as well to start with, but after just half of it, I could immediately feel the discomfort in my stomach. Here I was just having cleansed my system the previous day, but already polluting it again! 😀 But only advantage was that I could “feel” the pollution, so that was a good thing – hope I remember it the next time I pass by the cake shop! (ha ha high hopes)

———–

There are a couple of things I learnt by the whole excercise. Fasting is definitely a science, there’s no doubt about it. In my opinion, if at all it is done, it has to be done *completely* – the Jain way. I will now share two observations I made – which I speculate would’ve been impossible had I used the orthodox workarounds.

Occasionally during the day yesterday – especially towards the evening – there were some strange pains on the surface of my body. Consider an carbonated drink kept in a still glass – observe how bubbles randomly arise on the surface. That is how these pains were, they kept coming at random places and lasted only momentarily. Awareness of this, and staying equanimous wihout panicking wondering what is going on (and running to a doctor 😉 ), is I believe what self-purification is all about. I understand from this experience that fasting makes the situation more conducive to observing this phenomenon.

Another thing is that especially towards the evening, I could clearly make out the exchange of energy with me and the outside world. Whenever I took a deep breath – starting right from the diaphram using the entire capacity of my lungs, I would feel the increase in my energy. Inspite of it being the polluted air of Bangalore 😉 – air incredibly enough does contain energy! I could also feel the expenditure of energy when I spoke or walked around. Theorotically even air, water, sunlight are all sources of energy – but this was one time I could actually feel the increase in energy after simply taking a deep breath (no pranaayaama etc) more vividly than at any other time.

One thing I still don’t quite understand (not that I’ve understood everything else 😉 , but atleast I have some explanation that satisfies me) is how come I was fine till I completed the fast, and why did I feel terrible for a short while *after* I broke it. Maybe the digestive system felt overburdened all of a sudden, but any other suggestions/theories are welcome.

[Thanks Jigar for giving me this idea]. Btw now I have a better answer for “I don’t know what made me decide to try it as well” – it was primarily a gut feeling, and I’ve merely tried adding rational speculation later 🙂 But its wonderful feeling to know that there’s so much to learn and appreciate about the beauty of life – especially our own nature.